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Review: Organix Moroccan Argan Oil Hair products

Organix Extra Penetrating Moroccan Argan Oil Claim: This rare formula has a centuries-old history of providing natural vitamin E and antioxidants while renewing your hair’s cell structure, sealing in shine, and creating lush softness.

Review: Meh. I got the shampoo, conditioner, and extra penetrating oil. I will say outright that the oil is actually quite nice and works well to keep my (dry, wavy, frizz-tending) hair under control and shiny. I’ve no real complaints with it, really.

The shampoo and conditioner, however… feh. While all three products smelled quite good, I was sad to discover that the shampoo and conditioner did not perform as well as their sibling, the oil. Both myself and my roommate, Vesica, tried them several times.

At first, I did my usual lather-rinse-repeat routine. After the first lather and rinse, the shampoo left my hair feeling overprocessed and stripped, but not clean! Instead, it left a greasy and sticky texture that was rather disgusting.

Organix Moroccan Argan Oil Shampoo

I had hoped that the conditioner would fix this, as I was h

After my hair was dry, it felt both greasy and dry at the same time. It was frizzy and dull and limp, which was amazing because my hair is very thick and fluffy, and never in my life before this had it ever been limp.

orrified when I ran my fingers through my hair, as I was rinsing. Sadly, the conditioner did nothing to alleviate the nasty stickiness left behind by the shampoo. I even rinsed and repeated the conditioner twice, to no avail.

I gave the shampoo and conditioner another chance: perhaps it was too strong to lather twice? I only lathered up once, and found to my dismay that the stripped/sticky feeling of before was not a fluke. I then conditioned twice, the second time not even rinsing the conditioner out but leaving most of it in as a sort of styling cream, in a desperate attempt to get it feeling soft and frizz-free like usual.

And still no joy. Doing this eliminated the sticky stripped feel, but it felt greasy and limp still. At this point, I handed it over to Vesica to see if it were the product, or simply my hair, that wasn’t working. She reports that it sucked just as hard for her as it had for me, so that’s 4 thumbs down to this hot mess!

Cost: $7.99 each! So I’m bitter and resentful!

Repurchase: OH HELL NO. The oil is ok, but I probably wouldn’t buy it again. I wouldn’t use the shampoo or conditioner again if they gave it to me for free. Or even if they PAID me to use it.

Awesomesauce, decent, mediocre, or crapola: The oil I would consider “decent”. The shampoo and conditioner, however… I almost created a new rating for it: shit-tastic. But I decided that “crapola” was sufficient in addition to the above scathing review. This stuff sucks, yo.

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Review: Nyx Glossy Black Liner

Claims: The usual gung-ho collection of adjectives: sleek, dramatic, effortless, &c &c.

Review: It’s your typical twist-up eye pencil, I guess. Not glossy so much as has a faint sheen, scarcely noticeable. Quite dark black, but very hard and tugs on and skips across the skin in an annoying and sometimes painful manner.

It sets very quickly, so you have almost NO time to smudge or, if you’re a klutz like moi, fix your mistakes. Wears like iron, too, requiring dedicated eye makeup remover to get it off, which is either fantastic or awful, depending on your preferences.

Me, I like to be able to get my eyeliner off without scouring the flesh of my eyelids until they’re raw. But if you swim, are a cryer, or perhaps are a sex worker specializing in bukkake, the waterproof-plus quality of this liner could be a good godsend.

Cost: $6.00

Repurchase: Nah. There are plenty of other, softer, longer-setting-time, easier-to-remove liners just waiting for me to buy them.

Awesomesauce, decent, mediocre, or crapola: I will day mediocre, because of how it didn’t meet my particular needs, but on another person, it could well be decent, or, at this price point, even awesomesauce.

See what other people are saying: No reviews up on MUA yet.

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Review: Maybelline Dream Bouncy Blush

Review: I tell ya, I’m getting so tired of drugstore makeup. As in, I’m tired of staring at all of it, making my best guest as to what will look good, bringing it home, trying it, and finding it sucks ass, then having to return it.

This, mes amis, is another of those tales of woe.

I’m not going to bother describing the texture, smell, price, range of shades, or even which color I got, which is all moot, because this shit does not show up. Like, I put some on, and it was faint, so I put more on, and it was still faint. So I put on some more. And some more. And some more. And— you get the idea. I finally gave up trying to swipe it with my finger to apply; I picked up the container and rubbed the product directly on my face. Then blended.

Note: I am not a person of color, I am an average-tone, fairly pale white girl, so there is not much in the way of melanin getting in the way of this showing up.

After all that application, one might think that I’d look like a clown with a scorching case of rosacea by this point. One would be bloody well WRONG, because by the time I finished fucking around with my right cheek, the stuff I’d put on my left cheek? WAS GONE.

Yes, you read that correctly. Less than 2 minutes after application, the schmear I’d labored so hard to apply had somehow faded and disappeared and my cheek looked as if I’d never put anything on at all. WAS I MAD. Almost $8 and a lot of annoyance and my cheeks look naked?

Well, fuck that noise. Back to the store it goes.

Cost: $7.50, which is about $7 more than it’s worth.

Repurchase: Hell no.

Awesomesauce, decent, mediocre, or crapola: Crapola.

See what others think of this product: MakeupAlley

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Review: Edward Bess Ultra Slick Lipstick in Deep Lust

Claim: Seduce the curves of your lips with irresistible, radiant color. Creamy, long-wearing formula delivers superior hydration. Smoothes and shapes for the perfect pout.

Review: The first thing I noticed is that the case has substantial heft to it—made of metal, it’s sturdy and very cosmopolitan-looking in gleaming black with EB’s name logo in bright white. The cap snaps smartly on, so no worries about it coming off in your purse so the lipstick collects grit and lint. (or does that only ever happen to me?)

The smell is supposed to be fig, I hear, but to me it just smells like fake fruit. Pretty strongly, too. If you have a problem with scented cosmetics, this lipstick likely is not for you. The fake fruit smell persists for at least an hour, too, though it does get fainter as time passes.

Pigmentation is excellent, and color is buildable, so it’s like getting several lipsticks in one— you can put on a smidgen and get a slight stain of color, put on a sweep across each lip and get a bit more, or really swipe it on and get full color payoff. The color stays where it ought, without bleeding. That could be good news for mature ladies who are starting to get the feathering issue around the lips.

There is NO frost, these are straight creams, but they don’t quite hit “matte”; they remain creamy throughout, and do not feel gritty or look “old” after an hour or so— they just fade away, which is great, because usually when I wear lipstick, I have to find a tissue and wipe the last of it off so I don’t look busted.

My sole problem with this lipstick is that the color is totally wrong for me— Deep Lust is a bricky terracotta-looking brownish red (perhaps more of a reddish brown? IDK) and it makes me look like I’ve been freshly autopsied.

Also, it makes my teeth look yellow, and everyone who knows me knows that my choppers? Are white, baby. White as the driven snow. So when I smiled, wearing this, and found my mouth looking like instead of teeth I had kernels of corn? OH HELL NO. My hair is frizzy, my ass is chunky, and I keep getting zits on my chin, but my teeth are FABULOUS and I will not allow them to be slandered by the wrong shade of lipstick.

But since that’s not the lipstick’s fault, necessarily, I will not fault it. Therefore! I declare this lipstick the bomb.

Now to find someone who won’t look like a cadaver in it…

Cost: $32.00

Repurchase: Mosdef! But in a better-for-me color. I’m thinking the light coral Night Orchid, or Midnight Bloom’s blood-red if I’m feeling saucy.

Awesomesauce, decent, mediocre, or crapola: Awesomesauce!

See what others think of this product: MakeupAlley

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Review: Butter London Lippy in Trout Pout

Butter London Lippy in Trout Pout Claim: LIPPY colours are rich and heavily pigmented for a look that is deliberate, high fashion, and luxe. LIPPY does not contain parabens, petroleum, phthalates, sulphates, or bismuth.

Review: An interesting lipgloss, to be sure. Lots going on with it, so I’ll document my experience of it chronologically.

First thing I noticed was the petite size of it: it’s a pretty small tube. I was worried that you wouldn’t get your money’s worth in terms of quantity…until I put it on. A little goes a LONG way with this stuff. When I first pulled the doefoot wand from the container, I was like “Hey, nothing’s on it!” so I applied, then dipped and applied a second time.

And that was a mistake, because somehow the amount on the doefoot is more than plenty to slather on a good layer without double-dipping. My second pass put entirely too much gloss on my lips. This is important to mention, because it is VERY pigmented, and too much looks very plastic and artificial. Unless that’s the look you’re going for.

HOWEVER. After I degooped myself somewhat, I was left with a far more attractive coating, as intended. The smell was unobjectionable, and wear time was over an hour, even after drinking from a straw. This is a sticky, rather than creamy, gloss. Shine is good, and there is NO frost in it, so, yay! I hate frost in lip products.

My only prob A Cantaloupe. lem with this gloss is the color. Or rather, its inaccurate description. Butter London calls Trout Pout “an opaque shade of cantaloupe, pale and retro”. Being aware of the actual shade of a cantaloupe’s interior, I had hoped for if not an actual light peachy shade, then at least a light coral/warm pink. And this, once on, is most definitely a cool blue-pink bearing a strong resemblance to that beloved of Nikki Minaj. It is exactly the wrong type of pink for me (and doesn’t do Miss Minaj any favors, either, if I may be honest).

HOWEVER #2, if you do happen to look good in Nikki Minaj pink then ~~you are as rare as the mythical unicorn~~ Trout Pout is for you!

Cost: $17.00

Repurchase: This particular shade? No. But I would definitely give the other shades in the range a try. Snog (a “bright, happy, hot pink”) and Primrose Hill Picnic (a “happy, punchy, tropical fuschia pink”) both look like shades I can rock.

Awesomesauce, decent, mediocre, or crapola: Decent. I wish it weren’t quite this sticky. Once I try the other colors, I may find that it’s worth putting up with.

See what others think of this product: No reviews on MUA yet.

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Review: Too Faced BB Cream

Claim: “Our innovative beauty balm offers multiple skincare and makeup benefits in one simple step. Our powerful, multi-mineral complex instantly achieves a healthy glow and improves skin’s overall appearance.”

Review: It comes in four colors: vanilla, nude, cream, and beach, which run the racial gamut from A to F. If you happen to be the happy owner of more melanin than your average white person, Too Faced wants you to talk to the (presumably Caucasian) hand. This lack of inclusion puzzles me— to me, more shades = more people to buy = more $$. I guess Too Faced likes losing money.

Bald Eagle. Don't look like this. ANYhoozers. I used shade Vanilla. This stuff went on like the usual fluid foundation, rubbed in well, and dried to a reasonably velvety finish which did not need powder to set. This was a nice change from the last BB cream I tried, which felt like beige-colored grease and stayed sticky all the time. Even though it was a leeetle too light for me, it still blended in and absorbed well and I didn’t feel too much like a bald eagle.

It didn’t make my skin texture look cakey or overloaded with product, always a plus. The scent is very mild, almost undetectable. Coverage was decent for evening out skin tone, but it’s not very buildable— trying to use extra layers for concealing didn’t accomplish much.

Overall, it felt like a regular ol’ fluid foundation. Not entirely seeing the point of this vs. foundation, in fact. I think I’ll give up on BB creams in general, until I hear one of the other bloggers wanking off over a certain brand she loves.

Cost: $32.00.

Repurchase: Eh, if I can’t find a better one, maybe.

Awesomesauce, decent, mediocre, or crapola: Decent.

See what others think of this product: No MakeupAlley review available for this yet, it’s too new.

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Review: Buxom Stay-There Cream-Gel Eyeshadow

Claim: “This bounc-i-licious new eye color offers the ultimate experience with an unexpectedly plush, lightweight texture and vivid color. It leaps and bounds beyond what you’ve come to expect from eye color and better, yet, it’s even waterproof. Named after our loyal four-legged friends, these stay-put shades will be your faithful new beauty companions as they comfort and care for your pretty peepers. The mineral-infused, paraben-free formula pampers delicate skin with soothing Aloe extract and Vitamin E—all with a non-greasy, long-wearing finish. Touch it. Pet it. Love it.”

Review: Oookay, that’s quite a blurb. Even better? It pretty much lives up to all those claims. These cream-gel eyeshadows come in 14 shades, all of them gorgeous. There are brights like Shih-Tzu (lime green), Schnauzer (wild violet-plum), and Bulldog (intense cobalt blue) but also more muted tones for those of us not looking to make a huge statement with our eye makeup.

The depth of color in these shadows is amazing. I got Pug, a sort of dirty silver, and it’s GORGEOUS— silver, but a WARM silver, and also a hint of plum. It can shift warmer or cooler depending on what you’re wearing, or your eye color, etc. Truly versatile!

Pug has enough shimmer to keep it from being matte, but not so much that my eyelids look like 2 deranged disco balls. You can do a fast-and-filthy smoky eye using only it, in under a minute per eye. It looks wonderful with my brown eyes, but because it’s a neutral, would be amazing with any color.

The texture is a springy, creamy gel. You can apply with your finger, but I prefer a brush so my long fingernails don’t pierce it, and the greater control in application. It takes a little while to dry, so there’s time enough to use a teensy bit in a super-sheer wash for a daytime look, or to build up darker concentration in the crease for evening. It also blends beautifully with other shades, or entirely other products— I had great results with 2 different kinds of Ulta-brand cream eyeshadows.

Buxom Eyeshadow in Pug I’ve heard it creases, if you don’t use a primer, but I didn’t use my beloved UDPP (as a test for this stuff) and was surprised, happily! It didn’t crease on me, even after quite a few sweaty hours.

Cost: $17.00

Repurchase: Most definitely, unless I somehow find something as good for less money, somewhere!

Awesomesauce, decent, mediocre, or crapola: Awesomesauce!

See what others think of this product: MakeupAlley Review

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Review: Garnier BB Cream

Claim: To be a “miracle skin-perfecting cream that will renew radiance, brighten complexion, even skin tone, hydrate, and protect with SPF15”.

Review: Disappointment! Such hopes I had, after reading these claims. I should have done my research, as I usually do, but this time I was so excited to get my mitts on a BB cream that when I saw it in the Walgreen’s, I just nabbed it.

I tried this for over a week, hoping it would improve as I alternated my application. I tried putting it on with my hands, a sponge, a brush… no joy. Nothing made it any better. It’s creamlike in texture, but never really dries, so my face felt sticky literally the entire time it was on my skin, sometimes even 10 hours later.

It covered nothing. It was as if I were wearing regular lotion, coverage-wise: no evening-out of tone, no coverage of blemishes. My skin did not feel especially moisturized, just sticky. I was always so happy to get it off at the end of the day!

Cost: $12.99 at Walgreen’s, which is $10 too much for what you get. CVS just had it on sale for $10.99 and that’s still overpriced. It’s worth about a dollar for the whole (rather large) tube.

Repurchase: HELL TO THE NO.

Awesomesauce, decent, mediocre, or crapola: Crapola. For reals.

See what others think of this product: MakeupAlley Review

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The Battle of the Plumping Glosses

This battle of the plumping glosses is between Buxom’s Big & Healthy and Smashbox’s O-gloss.

Up first: Buxom Big & Health Lip Creme in White Russian. It tingled in a pleasant, subtle way, and worked so well that even though the gloss was a very pale nude, my lips pinked up nicely beneath it. (White Russian is 3rd from the left; I could not find a photo of it by itself). They cost $18.00 each for 0.14oz, and are formulated without parabens, sulfates, phthalates, GMOs, or triclosan.

Buxom Lip Cream

The Smashbox O-Gloss (lone color) tingled more powerfully, to the point of discomfort, and didn’t pink me up at all. It was basically a painful, clear gloss. Their site offers no info I could find regarding what ingredients are in their products. Could be nothing but formaldehyde and distilled evil, for all I know. It is $22 for 0.34oz.

Smashbox O-Gloss

Therefore, the winner of this battle is: Buxom! Their gloss did not cause pain, and they have other shades (the red in particular is a good way of trying out a red gloss if you’re afraid of looking trampy— it gives a juicy, strawberry-stain look. And the Barbie-pink? Very subtle and fun, not overly cutesy).

Finally, the price is most reasonable— $4 less than the O-gloss. You get 0.20oz more than the Buxom, but do I want 0.20oz more of something that hurts when I use it? I’m thinking… no.

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Review: L’Oréal Infallible Eyeshadow in Goldmine

Review: L'Oréal Infallible Eyeshadow in Goldmine Claim: Ultra-intense colour, up to 24 hour long-lasting hold and velvety soft feel.

Review: Keh. Maybe it’s just this color, but I just wasn’t as impressed as everyone else seems to be about this shadow. In the pot, it seems to be a lovely gold, but when applied, it’s very yellow, and not in what I consider to be an attractive way (I am not one who likes yellow, orange, or red eyeshadows— I think they look awful).

After about four hours, there was noticeable creasing in the inner half of my eyelid crease. However, a light swipe of my fingertip over the creased area smoothed the shadow out where it was supposed to be and everything looked fine again, so I won’t hold that against it.

Cost: $5 - 7, depending

Repurchase: possibly. I still want to try other colors, to see if my dislike of this was because it went so yellowy. I’ve heard good things about the taupe, sage, and silver.

Awesomesauce, decent, mediocre, or crapola: I’m going to call it “mediocre” for now, with the understanding that if the other colors are superior, I’ll upgrade the rating.

See what others think of this product: MakeupAlley Review

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Review: Clinique Lash-Building Primer

Claim: Lash-conditioning undercoat boosts the benefits of Clinique mascaras. Unique polymer combination holds mascara to lashes for a longer, fuller look and extended wear. Moisturizing formula helps condition and mend dry lashes.

Review: What an interesting dilemma. I already have rather thick and lashes, so I don’t “need” this product, but since I had it, thought I’d give it a try. I never thought I could have lashes that were TOO long and thick, but Clinique’s Lash-Building Primer has done it.

The Lash-Building Primer is a thick white substance that reminds me of vanilla cake frosting. I brushed it on until my lashes were well-coated, waited about 30 seconds, then applied two coats of mascara.

And now my eyelashes are so long, they’re brushing against the lenses of my glasses every time I blink. I didn’t curl them before using the primer and mascara (d’oh!) so they’re also obscuring my vision— my lashes are so long and fully, they’re literally swooping down into my field of sight. It’s… actually really annoying.

Combing through is essential with this primer, in my opinion. Opportunities for clumps lurk at each pass of the wand. I combed after applying the primer and each coat of mascara.

I actually used two kinds of mascara, one on each eye, to see whether dry or wet mascara worked better with the primer: Clinique High Impact (wetter) and Clinique Lash Doubling (dryer). I found that the wetter mascara did a superior job of coating the white film of the primered lashes. The dryer mascara just wasn’t loose enough and left some of the harder-to-get-to lashes tipped with white.

In all, this is a good purchase for those of us who need or want significant building-up of their lashes, and have the patience and time to use it. For those of us who want a faster and easier, get-out-the-door routine, it might not be the best choice for you.

Cost: $14.00

Repurchase: Probably not.

Awesomesauce, decent, mediocre, or crapola: Decent. If I had short and sparse lashes, it would probably be awesomesauce for me.

See what others think of this product: MakeupAlley Review

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Review: Hourglass Superficial Lash Mascara

Hardlyfatal Review of Hourglass Superficial Lash Mascara

Claim: Lash-defining and color-rich, Superficial Lash is a hydrating formula that coats lashes in weightless volume and sheen. Eyes are instantly highlighted as lashes visibly increase in volume, length and height.

Review: When I first pulled the wand from the tube, I thought I was in for another awful experience like the Urban Decay debacle.

This is a strange mascara, quite the Jekyl and Hyde of the mascara world. It is amazing with one coat, but horrible with two.

I think the culprit is the consistency— it is a very thick paste formula. This makes for a fantastic result if you’re only applying a single coat. You get wonderful length, very acceptable volume, and after a bit of combing through to separate lashes, a lovely natural-looking fan of lashes. In all honesty, unless you’re going for a drag-queen effect, you don’t need more than a single coat.

In the interest of thoroughness, however, I pushed on and put on a second, and this is where I ran into trouble. Applying it was not easy— the thick formula is just not able to go over the already-coated lashes and maintain the quality of the look already achieved with one coat. Combing through was nigh-impossible, leaving some lashes bunched together. Also, clumps uniformly appeared at the tips of the lashes with the second coat, easily dealt with by pinching them off.

The only shade offered is “carbon”, and you do get a very sooty-black, matte effect with this mascara. The brush is long and slender, with short spiralled bristles. I had no trouble getting to all the smaller lashes at the inner corners.

Cost: $26.00

Repurchase: High price point for something with a limited range, but if I have to choose between this or Diorshow for around the same price, I’d choose this!

Awesomesauce, mediocre, decent, or crapola: I’ve had to create a new qualification for this product: decent. Because of the impossibility of a second coat, it wasn’t entirely awesomesauce, but because of all the many good aspects if you limit yourself to only one coat, it wasn’t mediocre, either. So, decent it is!

See what others think of this product: MakeupAlley Review

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Review: Revlon Illuminance Creme Shadow

Claim: Layer and blend translucent shadows for amazing multi-color luminosity. Crease-resistant color glides on smoothly and stays on all day.

Review: Hm. Well, the colors are very pretty. I have the “Wild Orchids” palette, which consists of 4 small wells of cream shadow (blue-pink with silver shimmer, hyacinth blue-purple with silver shimmer, warm lavender with gold shimmer, and a dark burgundy-rose with gold shimmer. When I put them on, I was struck by how lovely the shades are— such a pretty, shimmery glow of color.

HOWEVER. Within a half-hour (yes, 30 minutes or less) of application, it fades and creases like mad. Except for the sheerest wash of color, every speck of it migrates to your crease, where it forms long, thick stringlike clots. Sexy, eh? I’ve tried all four colors, and it’s the same for all of them.

I also tried them over Urban Decay Primer Potion, with only slight improvement. Finally, I layered powder shadow over them, and that resulted in not only feeling like I had a pound of crap on each eyelid, it also made the creasing worse, as there was then so much more stuff to wander from where I wanted it over to where I didn’t!

Cost: ~$5.25. I think they might be discontinued, which is no tragedy. Even at the low price point, it’s not worth it.

Repurchase: Nah.

Awesomesauce, mediocre, or crapola: mediocre. It only misses being “crapola” because of how very pretty the colors are. I’m a sucker for good purples.

See what others think of this product: MakeupAlley Review

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Review: Urban Decay Skyscraper Multi-Benefit Mascara

Claim: Reach new heights with our drastically improved, six-in-one Skyscraper Mascara. Our innovative formula will lengthen, strengthen, separate, curl, brighten and thicken your lashes without even a hint of clumping or flaking. The state-of-the-art, new generation brush features a flexible shaft and multiple rows of tapered bristles to comb through lashes from root to tip. Skyscraper gives you that “come hither” look that gets ‘em every time

Review: Generally, I love Urban Decay’s products. Their Primer Potion is the bomb, their eyeshadows are fabulous. So I leapt at the opportunity to use this mascara, and boy did it suck balls. I don’t think there’s a single positive thing I can say about it.

Consistency: very dry, very difficult to get off the brush and onto the lashes.

Brush: soft rubber, very wiggly. Spineless. With no resistance, touching the wand to the lashes resulted in the lashes bending the brush away from the lashes. That plus the consistency issue as mentioned above meant I had to literally glob product from the gooey free end, then work with the brush to get it on the lashes.

Clumps: present, in spades. As were clots, globs, and chunks. The combing out I had to do! Which leads to…

Buildability: oy, vey. I had to do so much combing out that there was very little actual effect to the lashes— very little volume or length achieved per coat. I literally had to put on 4 coats to get any sort of “look” accomplished.

Color: a dull, chalky dark grey. I think they were aiming for black, but missed by a few shades.

Basically, this mascara is a steaming pile of poo. I’m usually able to coax decent results out of any mascara, but this took me well over 10 minutes to get anywhere with it. My arms got tired and I used up a half-dozen tissues in cleaning off my mascara comb and wiping away the smudges on my upper and lower lids.

And after all that effort, it still looked shitty. Hmf. I think this mascara has actually offended me. I feel offended by what it put me through.

Cost: $20.00

Repurchase: No fucking way.

Awesomesauce, mediocre, or crapola: Crapola.

See what others think of this product: MakeupAlley Review

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Review: Benefit You Rebel Tinted Moisturizer

Claim: Our defiantly different tinted moisturizers give your complexion coverage, moisture and SPF 15 protection all in one.

Review: This shit is awful. The texture is weird and at the same time pasty and greasy. It also separates, so you have to either massage the tube prior to dispensing, or squirt some out and blend it well prior to application. And with a metal tube, you KNOW it will eventually crack and stuff will ooze out.

The You Rebel line is very limited in shade “range”: there are 2 shades, and fuck you if you don’t match either, I guess. YR Lite might work better for me (MAC NC 20, in case you care) but I doubt the problems of its darker sister have been eradicated so why bother?

It’s not very blendable; I damn near wore the skin off my throat in trying to ease the tidemark of orangey color from jaw to neck, and it just wasn’t happening. It did not sink into the skin like a moisturizer should, very obviously sitting on top like a full-coverage foundation.

It wore like iron, which was a damned shame, as I was hoping it would abandon me so I could go back to looking normal and get this mess off my face (no time to remove it properly). Regardless of how long it had been on— minutes or hours- there was always this residue feeling that persisted.

The finish is shiny, in a bad way. It just feels greasy, and I could literally feel zits forming little sore spots as the day went on. When I was finally able to wash it off, my face (formerly a Clarisonic-honed perfection of baby-ass smoothness) had several blooms of tiny pimples at my temples, chin, and along my nose.

I thought, ok, maybe it’s just me. I loved Benefit’s Boi-ing Concealer, I love their Some Kind-A Gorgeous foundation (review coming soon!), so maybe it’s just me that this TM hates. I gave it to my friend, Vesica, to try. Her skin tone is darker than mine, so it might actually match her face.

Readers, it was awful on her, too. Greasy-feeling from the jump, it had the thick feel of foundation without any of the coverage— it didn’t mask any sunspots or freckles, or provide any noticeable evening of Vesica’s skin tone. Within two hours, she was thinking longingly of when she could wash it off her face, and regretting that it would be at least 6 hours in the future.

Cost: $30.00! Talk about being reamed without lube.

Repurchase: Oh HELL no.

Awesomesauce, mediocre, or crapola: Crapola.

See what others think of this product: Makeup Alley Review